Books
by kwiluvu
Summary: / / "Kiddo." / "Phft. What is it now?" / "Tell me what that book is." / "No." / "You've been reading it for weeks! What could possibly be so interesting that it takes you weeks to go through?" / "Maybe I just like pissing you off." / / Three-shot. Dialogue fic.
1. Positions

_**A/N: I'm taking a short, possibly one week break from At Sixes and Sevens because I'm just stuck. I know where I want to go and what I want to do, but I'm pretty stumped on how to get there. So until then, feel free to read these random one-shots I'm apparently posting now to get your KidStar (DeathStar, StarKid) fix.**_

* * *

"Kiddo, what're you reading?"

"None of your business, Black Star."

"What?! Everything is the business of the Great Black Star!"

"If you don't go away and stop interrupting me I will fucking Maka Chop you."

"... Okay."

* * *

"Kiddo?"

"Mm."

"What're you reading?"

"The same book as before, dumbass."

"I can _see_ that, I'm not dumb! What is it?"

"Nothing that concerns you."

"Why do you have a book cover over it?! Is it really that important?!"

"Maybe."

"AGH!"

* * *

"Kiddo."

"Phft. What is it now?!"

"Tell me what that goddamn book is."

"No."

"You've been reading it for weeks! What could possibly be so _fucking_ interesting that it takes you weeks to go through?!"

"Maybe I just like pissing you off."

"Hey!"

"Don't sputter, it's unbecoming."

"You're unbecoming!"

"That was an awful insult."

"_You're_ an awful insult!"

"That one didn't even make sense."

"You-! AAAAAGH!"

* * *

"Kid."

"Star."

"Tell me what you're reading or I'll be forced to do something drastic."

"Drastic? How... Intriguing."

"'Intriguing' my ass; we both know you're thinking 'adorable' or something equally as dumb."

"Yes, well, you do tend to act like a hyperactive seven year old most of the time..."

"Kiddo, I'd stop insulting me if I were you."

"Oooh, big bad Black Star has come out to play!"

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Hey! GIVE ME MY BOOK BACK-!"

"..."

"..."

"... A book on gay sex positions?"

"... It's none of your business."

"That's what you've been reading for the past three weeks?"

"It's none of your concern."

"..."

"Hey! What are you-"

"So you think I'm a seven year old, huh, Kiddo?"

"Stop looking at me like that-"

"Because I can prove that I'm far from it."

"Hey! Get out of my space, huh?!"

"And I don't need some _damn_ book to do it."

"W-What do you think you're- _**mmfph**_!"

"Don't sputter, Kiddo. _It's unbecoming_."


	2. Gods

"... I think I hate you right now."

"You could never hate me, Kiddo."

"You're a pain in my ass. Literally."

"Clearly you've been overwhelmed by mind blowing sex because that is the most overdone joke used by gay men in the _world_."

"Ah-huh."

"... Kid."

"Mm."

"... _Why are you reading another goddamn book?!_"

"What else would I be doing?"

"Worshipping your God, obviously."

"Hh."

"What? Don't look at me like th-"

"What are your intentions towards me?"

"I-"

"Stop sputtering and answer the question. Do you want to be in a relationship or not?"

"What- I don't know-!"

"... I guess you should be getting out of my bed, then. As quote unquote 'mind blowing' as you seem to think this coupling may have been, I'm not looking for a repeat. I'd like to be able to say I at least tried to save myself for someone who gave a damn."

"K-Kid, I-"

"Just get out, Black Star."

* * *

"Stop looking so miserable. Totally uncool."

"Souuuuuuuul, I fucked uuuuuup."

"Stop whining. Feel free to keep your head in your arms though, muffles the sound of your groaning."

"You are the literal _worst_ best friend in the world."

"Ugh. What the fuck did you even do, Star?"

"I slept with Kid."

"..."

"..."

"Oh, wow. I didn't know you were gay."

"I'm not. I'm not gay or bi or straight, or any other established sexuality or lack thereof... I just like Kid. I'm Kid-sexual so to speak."

"That makes you sound like a pedophile."

"Ew."

* * *

"Maka, your boyfriend gives terrible advice!"

"He's not my-"

"He won't tell me what to do about Kid! Who won't even look at me, by the way..."

"Well, what'd you do?"

"You just assume it's me-!"

"Why would you need advice if it weren't you?"

"..."

"Exactly."

"... I slept with Kid and I think I made him think I don't wanna be boyfriends but I do because he's pretty much- no, he _is_- the most perfect thing in the whole world and-"

"Slow down. You need to apologize, right? Get him a book. Kid loves books."

"Trust me, I know."

* * *

"What kind of a book are we looking for?"

"Don't know. When I see it, I'll know."

"So uncool."

"I'll find a book fit for a God to give his love!"

"That's one of your biggest problems there, dumbass. You can't be in a relationship proclaiming yourself to be a God or that you're going to surpass the Gods. That's not how it works, because to be in a relationship you have to think of the other person as your own, personal God."

"But-"

"That's not to say they can do no wrong. Gods make mistakes too, sometimes. Regardless though, they are your God and you need to treat them as such. And if they appreciate you as much they'll treat you the same. If they don't, they're not worth it."

"..."

"..."

"... I think that's the most I've ever heard you talk."

"Shut up."

"..."

"..."

"Soul."

"What?"

"I found the book."

"... That looks like the cheesiest fucking book on the planet."

"But it'll get my point across."

"Hh. That it will."


	3. Apologies

"Kiddo?"

"What do you want."

"Can I come in, please?"

"No. This is my room and you're staying out of it."

"Am I?"

"You are. The door's locked."

"We'll see."

* * *

"Kiddo-"

"Jesus Christ! How did you get in?!"

"I climbed through the window."

"What the fuck do you even want."

"I wanted to give you this."

"What makes you think I want anything from you?"

"It's a book. As an apology. I'm apologizing. I'm sorry about the way things happened the other day. You caught me off guard while I was planning ways to win you over."

"Win me..?"

"Can you please just look at the book?"

"... Okay."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... 'Ten Thousand Reasons Why I Love You'?"

"Mhm."

"This looks to be just about the cheesiest book in the world."

"It gets worse if you open it."

"Which page?"

"Any of them."

"..."

"Told you."

"All they say is 'I love you' over and over and over."

"I know."

"... I'm going to kiss you now."

"I'm not going to complain."

* * *

"Do you think it's safe to go in yet?"

"No, they're probably halfway to having sex by now, I don't recommend it Maka."

"I don't hear anything though, Liz."

"Hm... Alright, I'll get the key, but you asked for it."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Here we go, key in and- oh. Hm."

"They're... Asleep."

"It's cute. Is that a book in Kid's hands?"

"Yeah. Black Star got it for him."

"I'm not surprised. Kid loves books."

"That's what I said."

"Well, we should leave them to it, then."

"Mhm. Thank God, I was getting tired of all that sexual tension. They go through this process at _least_ every two months. Break up, have sex, get back together."

"I know, it's awful. It works for them, though."

"That it does... Something's different this time, I think. They've never said 'I love you' before."


End file.
